Pregnancy Positives
The joy and privilege of growing a human
Being pregnant is such a unique and amazing experience. I have been wanting to stop and reflect on it, but with all of the life events of the past year, pregnancy itself has gone by in a blur. But now, with my due date less than three weeks away, I know that at any moment in the next month, I could be transitioning to the next stage of parenthood: the birth of our baby. In some ways I'm ready, but I'm also not in a hurry for pregnancy to end.
Everyone's pregnancy experience is different; some moms love it, some struggle through it, and for many of us, it's a mix of feelings. I won't glamourize the painful varicose veins, unsightly stretch marks, constant fatigue, and six-plus weeks of all-day sickness. But before I'm busy with diaper changes and sleepless nights (sleepless thanks to baby feedings instead of restroom trips, that is), here are a few things I've truly loved about this nine month season of life.
Feeling baby move
I'm starting at the end with what I suspect is many pregnant women's favorite part: baby kicks. How cool is it to experience a tiny person wiggling around inside you? I love feeling—and toward the end, seeing—the little kicks and stretches. It's fun to guess which knobby baby body part is protruding from my abdomen: Is that a foot? An elbow? A shoulder? And thanks to the wonder of ultrasound technology, we can peer inside and see those little parts taking shape. Even baby hiccups, which in my opinion are one of the most odd pregnancy sensations, are a reminder that there's a little person in there getting ready to break out into the world.
Showing up with a built-in shelf
The pregnant body isn't always convenient, especially if you're my height. Whenever I try to wash dishes or brush my teeth, the baby bump gets in the way. But cradled in the right maternity clothes, my baby belly is kinda cute, and can be a useful shelf for holding a pint of non-dairy ice cream or (with one hand to spot it) a cup of tea—at least until baby tries to kick it off.
The bump also serves as an announcement to the world that I'm expecting, and most of the time (though certainly not all), that results in kindness from strangers. During the first trimester, when you're queasy and exhausted, no one knows the reason unless you tell them. But later in pregnancy, people see the bump and open the door for me. A restaurant hostess told me I'm the cutest pregnant lady she's ever seen. Older ladies stop me in the store to tell me about their grandbabies. Everyone asks how I'm feeling. Even after answering the questions of "Is it your first?" and "Is it a girl or a boy?" for the hundredth time, it's nice to be acknowledged and appreciated as a mother.
Positive body changes
Pregnancy takes a toll on the female body, but not all changes are bad. I certainly don't mind the 40-week break from monthly feminine discomforts and frequent migraines. Some women enjoy enhanced curves, softer skin, or an overall pregnancy glow. Pregnancy hormones cause hair to grow faster but fall out less, which in my house means the floors and shower drain are remarkably free from the long hairs I normally shed. And I don't feel cold as often as usual. Part of that could be that it's summer in Florida, but I'll take it.
Free entertainment thanks to crazy dreams
Okay, I don't really love this part, but it is interesting. I always have intense, vivid dreams when I'm pregnant, and waking up frequently during the night causes me to remember the odd scenes and sensations, at least for a little while. How is this dream-person a perfect mashup of my high school classmate and my current coworker, and why are we at my grandparents' house from my childhood? Does it mean anything that I dreamed about having a baby girl and her first spoken word was "Christmas tree"? (In real life, I'm expecting a boy who will probably say his first words in the summer.) My subconscious continues to intrigue me with its creativity.
Self-care isn't selfish
We know self-care is important, but there's a balance between caring for one's own physical, mental, and emotional health, and being straight-up self-indulgent. During pregnancy, I find it easier to make time and space for myself, guilt-free. Craving a diet high in gluten-free waffles and gingerale? Go for it; you're eating for two. Need a nap? Of course you do; here's a pillow and a blanket. Too queasy and tired to cook? No problem; I already picked up your favorite takeout meal. (Those are paraphrased quotes from my incredible husband. I'm blessed to have people in my life who support me in all seasons, but I'm especially appreciative of the extra level of care my loved ones give me when I'm carrying a plus-one.)
The genetics of love
Most of all, I'm grateful for the privilege of conceiving and carrying this child. Realizing the prevalence of miscarriages and fertility issues, it's not something I take for granted. No matter what discomforts my pregnant body might feel, knowing there's a small human growing in there—a unique person with a soul, and one who is somehow miraculously half me and half the person I love most in the world—is overwhelmingly joyful.
I'm so excited to meet our baby, to see his tiny face in the light of the outside world, and to discover his personality as he grows into the little man he'll become. But I don't have to wait for that moment to love him. Being a pregnant mom is a gift in itself, and I'm finding joy in the experience.
- MJ
Life of You
If you have experienced pregnancy, what did you like most about it?